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I'm pretty sure I met the first girl on Tinder, because I'm a pretty talented Tinder slayer after a few personality drinks are consumed. You can hardly focus on a first date because all you're doing is thinking about yourself. OMG, I HAVEN'T DONE THIS IS SO LONG."Can you see a theme here? I was sick with a classic case of first-date narcissism. Did I reveal too much when she asked me about MY childhood? So the next date we went to dinner at my favorite restaurant on Park Ave South, a gorgeous place with double high ceilings called Barbounia. "And I deeply listened to her answers as if her words carried the key to the great mysteries of the world. I felt like a therapist who was being paid in shellfish.We met at a cool Downtown speakeasy-style bar that had glittery cocktail tables and beautiful model-esque waitresses and appetizers about the size of three whole almonds. Let me break it down for you: As a woman with massive cleavage and big chandelier earrings brought me over my date's table, I kept thinking, "SHIT, do I hug her? For the second date, I was far less fixated on myself, because I wanted to see if I liked this girl. I learned that she hailed from glam Long Island, her parents divorced when she was sixteen and her screwed-up phase was when she was 17 when she had a brief flirtation with an eating disorder (OMG, me too! As I walked four miles back uptown to my little six-story walk-up apartment I thought about HER. Because I was so curious in figuring out she was, I hadn't let myself feel any chemistry."Oh you're going on the third date?So, because lesbians are women, misogyny and homophobia work in conjunction to form what is called a double oppression, making an already tough world even tougher for lesbians.
On top of growing up in a patriarchal culture, women who are same-sex oriented also live and evolve in a homophobic society.
When these issues are not addressed, they can unconsciously be projected onto one’s partner resulting in relationship difficulties.
Let's go back in time, sweet kittens, to when 28-year-old Zara had just moved back to the big, bad island of Manhattan and was super single and ready to mingle.
However, even when a lesbian comes out and is very prideful about it, these internalized messages are still things that they have to deal with.
These are messages that tell women they are not good enough, or do not matter; they devalue what women have to say, telling them that when they defend themselves, they’re somehow “too much” to handle.
So the moral of the story is this: Give it three dates.